Nurturing a Positive View of the Gospel
“…do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?”—Romans 2:4 (ESV)
After writing about helping kids recognize sin, I began reflecting on my own story. Seeing my sin clearly has been one of God’s kindest gifts to me. I grew up doing what was expected—obedient, responsible, successful—and I assumed my good behavior meant I was good before God. Even after coming to Christ, I still believed my sin was just something to manage by doing better next time.
It wasn’t until I hit the bottom after our adoption that I saw my real need. My heart wasn’t just doing bad things—it was impure without Christ. Yet that’s where God met me, lifting me from the pit and setting me on solid ground (Ps. 40:2).
Seeing our sin is never pleasant, but it makes grace shine brighter. That’s why I want to help my children see theirs—not to shame them, but to show them the beauty of the gospel.
Guiding Our Children Back to God’s Circle of Blessing
Correction is never easy, and even as a parent of adult children, I still don’t have a perfect script. What matters most is using our words to draw our children back into God’s circle of blessing through confession, obedience, and worship—helping them see both their need for God and the goodness of the gospel.
1. Shape a Positive Posture Toward the Gospel
Though our kids may not grasp all the details of the gospel, they learn a lot about God from how we respond when they do wrong. If our tone is mostly threat or frustration, they’ll assume God is the same.
But when our correction reflects grace, they begin to see obedience as delight, not duty. Our own joy in the gospel—imperfect though it may be—shows them what it means to serve God out of love, not fear. As we keep growing in our grasp of His grace, we invite them to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Ps. 34:8).
So when you correct, name the wrong without condemning: “Taking the toy was unkind; God wants us to love others.” However, don’t stop there—point them to Christ: “That’s why Jesus came—to help us love even when we don’t want to.” This shows them that He doesn’t just give commands, he helps us to obey them too.
2. Connect the Gospel to Daily Life
Our sinful hearts have already disrupted our fellowship with God. The sinful actions that flow from those hearts give us a tangible way to help our children understand that separation. When we faithfully and consistently address these moments throughout the day, they begin to tangibly experience the distance between themselves and God.
It’s tempting to think, ‘Not again! We just talked about this!’ Yet that very frustration reminds us how deeply we all need grace. Apart from Christ, we cannot help but sin—and for our children who do not yet know Him, it’s what comes naturally.
These repeated moments are opportunities to sow gospel seeds. Every time we return to the same heart issue, we remind them—and ourselves—that we can’t change by sheer willpower. After each incident, we can guide them to admit their sin to God, which begins to teach repentance. We can help them pray for His help to remember next time, nurturing dependence on Him rather than self-effort. And we can assure them that God loves them and desires to help them, even as they learn what that means.
3. Show That Separation From God is Serious
Because the idea of separation from God is abstract, discipline helps make it tangible (more to come on this topic in the next post!). Sin creates distance—from God and from one another—and that is one of its most serious consequences. Being out of fellowship with Him means losing the nearness, comfort, and joy of His presence.
If we’ve been showing our children that God is loving and good, then being apart from Him is a sad thing. Loving discipline gives a small picture of this truth. Punishment seeks to make a child feel small and ashamed, but helpful discipline aims to teach that sin isolates, breaks trust, and disrupts peace.
Dealing with sin is never pleasant, but it mirrors what God Himself did for us. Out of love, He faced the seriousness of sin through the cross so that we would not bear its final consequence. When discipline ends in reconciliation, we reflect the gospel—and a loving Father who does not leave us in sin but welcomes us back through Christ.
4. Remember God’s Role in Awakening Faith
As we repeat truth and correction, our children begin to see their need for God’s help. Each moment becomes a seed the Spirit plants to draw their hearts toward the gospel. Pray regularly with them and for their hearts to respond, trusting God’s timing to awaken their faith.
Keep in mind that children respond differently. Some may recognize their need early, others much later. There is no set developmental milestone as there is with walking or talking. Spiritual life is always a work of the Spirit, not a product of our efforts or an average age. We plant and water, but He gives the growth (1 Cor. 3:6–7).
Our role is to guide and pray, not pressure. I encourage you to resist the urge to rush them toward “praying the prayer.” Instead, patiently correct, pointing to their need for help, praying He would bring true repentance, and then trusting that God is working, even if it’s unseen. Ask that He will shine the light of His glory in their hearts (2 Cor. 4:6) and that His kindness will one day lead them to repentance (Rom. 2:4).
The Hope That Anchors Our Parenting
As we look back over all these truths, let’s remember—parenting isn’t about perfect methods, but about pointing our children to a perfect Savior. If your mind feels a little overwhelmed, you’re not alone—this part of parenting stretches us deeply. It asks us to look beyond behavior to the heart, to unseen realities even we may not fully grasp. Yet Scripture helps us see both truths: we are sinful, and we are in the hands of a good God.
When we teach and discipline faithfully, we give our children a small picture of what sin does and why we need Christ. They may not fully grasp it yet, but our steady, loving correction helps them begin to see the gospel as God’s beautiful gift to lift their burden. In the next post, we’ll take a closer look at this topic of loving discipline and how it can help our children experience reconciliation as the heart of the gospel.
